God has given to each of us, gifts. Ephesians chapter 4 speaks to this and the fullness of God. When I first came across this passage in the bible I didn't know what my true calling was, but I believed that God would reveal it and bless me to work within it. After all, working for someone else isn't as thrilling as working for self, and working for self isn't as fulfilling as working for God.
The quest to find my gift began with a questionaire given at church one Sunday. It was designed to narrow down the areas where one might be gifted and to display optional career paths. My anwers indicated areas like leadership, service and teaching, if I remember correctly. I didn't trust the results for a second and I was disappointed because I sensed there was something missing; something the survey didn't say. So I prayed. I literally prayed day and night and felt like Jacob wrestling with the angel. I am not not going to let you go until you bless me! I wanted God to show me what my gift was so that I could be happy. I was miserable dealing with the situation at my current job, even though it paid the bills and then some. Instead, I wanted to feel a joy overflowing when doing the thing(s)that God had equipped me to do. I longed to show the world that the master had spoken on my behalf. "This is her gift", I imagined people saying. So I could not fail. I was already growing tired of being tested by those who felt they had power to validate me... or not.
More Research
I jotted down all the things I liked to do, whether good at them or not, and with no regard to frequency of task. My list conatained things like sewing, finances, and drawing. I wrote about what I thought I was good at and allowed myself to explore subjects I thought I hated like cooking and exercise. I kept expounding on likes and dislikes of various tasks until I was left with a few areas of interest. I even learned that I actally enjoyed some things I had thought I didn't.
But that's not how I found my gift. Self-assessment was a big key, but it was God who put the yearning in me, thus only God could reveal it. The kicker was that he had not been trying to keep it a secret, as I suspected. It was I. I was the one repressing the gift so that I might gain fortune through an easier, smarter route. The thought never crossed my mind about how happy I'd be working to my true calling. I couldn't fathom the joy I'd feel while glorifying my saviour, and at the same time knowing he would totally provide for me.
Finding It
Fast forward several years and I can now say that my gift is writing. It seems so obvious now, but arriving at this point took some time. So maybe your passion is your gift or maybe you don't have a clue about what you're able to do. Then, there is no other way. Ask the Lord to show you and support you. He will provide clarity and with it a certain peace. Absorb it, then work energitically and with all your heart. Move with purpose for he hath done great things. Identifying your gift is just the beginning. The best is yet to come!
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